Ha ha

The latest edition of my retirement magazine has been a bit of a disappointment - I can usually guarantee to find at least two or three jokes in there worthy of posting, but this time there was really only one, which is not so much a joke as a comment on modern life. It is, by the way, supposed to be a true story, although I'm certain it's been embellished along the way -

An elderly gentleman in a small town in Mississippi was about to go to bed one night when he saw some people rifling through his garden shed. He rang the police. They asked if there was anybody actually inside the house, to which he said no. They then said that all their patrols were busy, that he should lock all his doors and windows, and they would send someone along when they could but it might be some time. The man put the 'phone down, counted up to 30, and then 'phoned them again.
"Hello" he said "I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot them" and he hung up.
Within five minutes, six police cars, a SWAT team, a helicopter, two fire trucks, a paramedic and an ambulance showed up at his house, and the burglars were caught red-handed.
One of the policemen said to the man "I thought you said you'd shot them?" The old man smiled and said "I thought you said there was nobody available!"